This post could be titled several things. I tossed around ideas like “It’s a small, small world”, “Here’s to my boy Tom”, and “Another crazy event in the life of KCB”. On the way to work this morning, after running the events of the weekend through my mind again, I settled with “What’s on my face?” because clearly, there is something about me that shows so boldly that people think it is easy to take advantage of me. Something about my personality that leads others to believe I am a fool. I’m not a ditz. I don’t act like Kelli Pickler. I don’t use the word “like” obsessively. I can hold my own in conversations about politics, religion, and other hot topics. And I carry myself with confidence and poise. So what is it? What’s on my face that tells people to try to pull one over on me?
An incident this weekend is what provoked this. Here’s the story:
My roommate and I got silly one night and decided to set up profiles on Match.com. Over the past two months, both of us have talked to a few different guys. I had been talking to this one guy Tom (here’s your shout out buddy! – when we were talking Tom kept asking when I was going to mention him on my blog…..though we’d never met. Eye roll.) for several weeks on a regular basis. It finally got to the point where I was wondering if he was ever going to ask me out. Our schedules were opposite, so I thought it was just a matter of timing. Then another week or so passed and I was getting confused, so I brought it up to him. Four times. And four times he made a simple comment and the subject was changed. I let it go, more confused, but at least not too emotionally invested since, after all, I’d never met this guy. Finally, it moved into the creepy category. I mean come on, talking on the phone regularly for over a month and still no mention of meeting in person? That is just plain weird. W-E-I-R-D! So, I’d had it and let it go. A few days later I get an email from him. I emailed him back and told him what I was thinking. Basically, I told him that I thought he must have a girlfriend, be 68 years old, addicted to porn, of have some other socially unacceptable issue going on and that if he didn’t and wanted to meet me then to call and ask me out already. I did not hear from him. I figured I’d hit the nail on the head with something and at least I don’t have to deal with it anymore.
This weekend, while dinking my Mich Ultra at the cool piano bar that we went to in the city, my roommate points out that she thinks Tom is standing behind me. I turned. And it was indeed him. Just to make sure, before we got all girly about it. I had my friend’s husband get the scoop. Yeah, we were right. It was him. And apparently he was there with his girlfriend. Hmmm, how’d I guess? Eye roll.
Now in all fairness, I learned that it wasn’t a long time girlfriend and they had met on Match. And frankly I don’t really care about any of that. What astonished me most was that in the, what is it 3rd largest city in the nation, I would run into him at all. And not only was he at the bar. He was there with the SAME GROUP OF PEOPLE as me and my friends! I was amazed. And it was fun to watch him squirm a little and make his best attempts at avoiding eye contact with me and Jen. HA!
Now the reason this post is titled as such is because as humorous as this situation was, it makes me wonder what kind of idiot people, specifically those of the male breed, think I am. I mean, there’s been females in my life who’ve been foolish, but mostly it’s guys that feed me lines and lines of lies. And somehow know exactly what lies will work with me, like they have a handbook or grilled my best friends for info. I’m nervous, because one of the pros is coming this weekend. Maybe that’s why the whole Tom think happened now, to get me ready for the Master Manipulator this weekend? I don’t know. The only thing I’m certain of is that I’ve developed HUUUUGE trust issues and I feel sorry for a guy that is genuinely interested in me. I give no one the benefit of the doubt anymore. And beyond that, I create faults before they are even there. I hate the people that made me this way, but I haven’t met enough sincere people to change it back – you know like how the negative is so much stronger than the positive. Ugh. I want to trust people more, but I just can’t. I guess I hope that when the genuine guy does finally come along, he’ll stick it out until I get to where I need to be.
In the meantime, if you know me, or meet me, and you can see the ugly blob of naivety on my face, can you help me out a bit so I can try to wipe it off?
